My intention was to record this the way Henry Gould has done for quite awhile now. But (a) I’ve run out of pre-Christmas time, and (b) I don’t have Gould’s guitar skills and so would look like an idiot. (Not to mention my, um … limited range, which the chords for this have been adjusted to accommodate.) Still, I like this little twist on “I’ll Be Home for Christmas,” and I hope somebody with musical talent and a taste for funny/mean lyrics may pick it up and make me—I mean “us,” of course—famous.